Home is Only Temporary
by batsindacave97
Summary: Karma doesn't really know to decipher her feelings well. When she's lost and alone there's only one place she knows where she is welcome.. or so she thinks. This is my play on what is running around in that complicated little head of Karma's! Hope you enjoy it!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! This is my first Faking It fanficion! I am so excited that I have finally put this down in writing. This is sort of how I think Karma will figure out her feelings for Amy. Not exactly, but the same concept. I might finish this, I might now. It really depends if the inspiration hits me. This is how I see it all play out. Reviews and criticism would be greatly appreciated! Enjoy! **

**P.S. Karmy all the way!**

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><p>She didn't know why she stepped out the front door. She didn't know why she was walking in the dark cold, but she was. She couldn't understand why the two most important people in her world would want to inflict such pain on her, but here recently, she didn't know a lot of things. She did know this though; her body was numb. Her mind was blank. Her tolerance for anything and everything was absolutely gone. Her heart was experiencing such pain that it had never experienced before. Needless to say, the helpless girl was on autopilot. Her body's default setting was to go to the place that was home.<p>

She hadn't spoken to Amy for days. She had no idea how Amy would react when she would show up at her door. At this point, she didn't care. She was  
>tired. Emotionally drained. She didn't care how bad the blonde had screwed up. She was confused and hurt. She just wanted her best friend.<p>

As she continued walking she replayed the events of _that night. That night _when Amy confessed to having more than platonic feelings towards her, she didn't know how to react. So she reacted the way Karma would.

"Amy, I love you too. More than anything in this world, just not like that."

What she said what made everything go downhill. What she said only caused Amy pain. But she did mean what she said… _that night._

Ever since _that night, _new feelings and thoughts have slowly started to creep up on her.

Karma couldn't understand the emotions that were stirring inside her as the beautiful Brazilian locked lips with her best friend. So she did what Karma did best. She ignored it just like all of her other insecurities.

At the group hang, what she felt was confusing, but it was more clear to her then. That was the night Amy informed her that she hadn't told Reagan about her. She was hurt.

"We're best friends, we're insanely close, and I was in love with you."

"Was?"

As much as she didn't want to admit it to herself, that bothered her. She was jealous and even Liam knew it.

"You just can't stand the thought that one day Amy might love someone as much as she loves you.."

Just like everything else, she ignored it.

So ever since _that night, _Karma hadn't really known what to feel. But now, Karma didn't now how to feel. The pain had numbed her. And that's why she was here. That's why was standing at the gate to Amy's house. Maybe Amy would fix her. Maybe she would make everything better. Amy was her only hope right now.

She approached the steps to the house. Each step she took only became more painful. What was she going to say? She didn't even know what was stirring inside of her right now. How was she going to put everything that was running wild inside of her into words? Everything hurt and she wanted the pain to go away, but it wouldn't leave. She was desperate.

Amy was the only one that could touch her wounds and leave them in better shape than she found them. Amy was the only one that could make her smile, even when she was on the verge of crying. She wanted Amy to fix everything, even though she was the one that shattered it all in the first place. But she couldn't find herself to care. She wanted her best friend. No. She needed her best friend.

She took a deep breath and carefully hit her knuckles to the door. She was left alone with her thoughts until Farrah opened the door. She was greeted with a wide smile and bright green eyes.

"Why hello Karma! I'm guessing you're here to see Amy?"

"Yes. Is she here?", Karma carefully asked.

"She's in her room. Lately, I can't get her out of there for anything!"

Karma knew exactly why. She wasn't the only one hurting from all of this.

"She told me she didn't feel good today at school." She hadn't talked to Amy since all this chaos started.

"Well come on in sweetie. She's right upstairs."

Karma came in and closed the door behind her. The house was filled with a sweet aroma. It was cake. This made her stomach growl. Her appetite had been absent and she hadn't been eating. For some reason, the house, the smell unleashed the desire to eat. She ignored the hunger and made her way to the carpeted stairs.

She swallowed hard and ascended the stairs. As she climbed each step, she admired the pictures hanging along the wall. She couldn't help but feel a little sparkle in her stomach when she spotted one of her and Amy.

It was the picture of them on Amy's 13th birthday. Amy's face was plastered with a big smile and cake. She remembered that day so vividly. She remembered the way Amy laughed and screamed "Karma!" after she shoved her face into the blue frosted cake. She remembered how much they were both hurting from laughing so hard. She also remembered the night proceeding the birthday party. That was the night they both hung up the glow-in-the-dark stars on her ceiling. It was work getting them up there, but to them, "the marvelous view" was so worth it. She remembered how safe she felt in Amy's arms that night as they stared at them. Amy was warm. She smelled of lavender. She molded perfectly into Amy's arms.

She had never missed the warmth and the safeness as much as she did right now.

Finally, Karma was at Amy's door. She felt nervous. She had no idea what she was going to say. She had no idea what Amy was going to say. But there she was so she did the most obvious thing. She swallowed and knocked three times.

"Lauren, leave me alone. I'm fine."

"It's Karma.."

She heard silence for a moment but it was soon disturbed by a twist of the knob.

The door squealed and there she was. She was face to face with all the pain and confusion that she had been feeling lately. Her throat went dry.

Amy looked worn out. There were dark circles underneath her eyes. Her hair was messy, but it looked perfect. Her donut shirt was hanging perfectly off of her shoulders. There she was. It was Amy. The person she had been wanting for so long was right in front of her. Before Amy could say anything, Karma did the only thing her body knew to do. She flung herself into Amy's arms.

She was flooded by everything she had been craving for days. The warmth, the scent, the safety. She was right in the middle of it and she didn't' want to leave.

Amy sniffled, "Karma. I'm so sorry."

Still resting her head on Amy's chest, Karma didn't say anything. Her heart ached and even at this point, she didn't know exactly what to say.

Was she ready to forgive Amy? She didn't know.

Amy was the first one to let go. Karma felt the warmth escape her arms. She was left with a stare from teary, deep green eyes. She looked away because it hurt to much. It hurt to see her friend so hurt and lost.

"Karma, please look at me. It was a mistake. It was a drunken mistake. I was hurt.." Amy sighed.

Karma looked up and returned her stare. She hadn't her voice for days. She missed it. She missed the smoothness. She listened to every word that was coming out of her lips. Her lips. That was the only thing she could pay attention to right now.

"So was Liam, but that didn't give us the right. I am so deeply sorry. Karma, plea-"

Amy's words were cut off by Karma's lips.

Both of their mouths danced together in harmony. Karma ran her hands through her hair, desperately grabbing anything and everything she could take. Her hair smelled like lavender and lips tasted of cherries. This was everything Karma had been craving for these past days. All of the sudden, all her pain, all of her confusion, it was all washed away by Amy's kisses. The deeper Karma kissed her, the more of herself she felt. It finally hit her. This was home.

Karma left kisses along Amy's neck. This felt so right. So good. Karma didn't feel so numb anymore. She was intoxicated by the smell of Amy and her lips moving against hers.

Amy quickly pulled away and grew pale.

Karma finally spoke, "What's wrong?"

She didn't look at her. She only stared behind Karma.

Karma turned around to see what Amy was so concerned. She wish she hadn't turned around.

The girl with the purple and black hair dropped the box she had in her hands. She stood there at the top of the stairs and looked directly at Amy with a blank expression. She didn't look mad. She didn't look sad, just empty. After the cruel silence, she finally spit something out.

"You were right, shrimp girl. You're not straight at all."

She quickly descended the stairs. Amy let go of her and chased after Reagan.

Karma was left with the pulsing of her lips. The pulsing that was created by Amy.

What had she done?

She peeked through the window and saw Amy and Reagan arguing. She could only here loud yells but couldn't make out any words. Reagan threw up her hands and walked away from Amy. She slammed the door to her truck and drove off with no time to waste. Amy was left on the side walk.

She didn't know what Amy was going to do. I mean, Amy loved her right? She kissed her hard and everything about it felt right. Maybe Amy wouldn't be mad. She went to Amy's doorway and waited for her.

A couple of minutes later, she heard steps coming up the stairs. Amy bent down and picked up the box that Reagan hastily dropped. It was a box of donuts. She chuckled. Karma couldn't figure out what kind of chuckle it was. It scared her.

Amy looked up at her with tear-filled eyes. Karma's stomach collapsed.

"Karma, please leave."

Karma's throat went dry and her eyes filled with tears.

"Amy.. No.. I'm.."

With more sternness in her voice Amy said "please.."

Karma cried harder.

"Karma go! Leave! Can't you see what you've done?" Amy sniffled "You can't do this. It's not fair. Please, just leave!"

Amy walked past Karma with the box of donuts. She continued to her room and slammed the door behind her.

Now, Karma knew how Amy felt that night. She sat on the ground and had her back against Amy's door. She cried and cried for a long time. She thought she was hurting before, but this feeling was much worse than before. She finally figured it out. After weeks and weeks of pushing it all back. It finally hit her.

She was in love with Amy.


	2. Chapter 2

**I guess the inspiration hit me! Actually, I felt like I would disappoint people if I didn't continue so here I am. Plus, this is how I would imagine what takes place in this chapter. I wrote it in a different way. I tried other ways, but it didn't flow like this did. The next chapter will be written the way the first was. I do not know when I will update next. I just happened to have a lot of time today. Reviews are appreciated greatly. Hope you enjoy!**

**I do not own Faking It even though I want to.**

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><p>Everything felt so right. The dim lighting that set the perfect ambience. The warmth of her smooth skin pressed up against yours. The way your nose was flooded by the sweet smell of her hair and bed sheets . The way she nipped at your lip just hard enough to make that pit in your stomach collapse again. But that was a reoccurring feeling. You were collapsing over and over again into everything that was Amy Raudenfeld. It was perfect. It was all so perfect and there was no other place you wanted to be; except there in that very moment.<p>

You carefully left warm, slow kisses along her neck and jaw line. You took in a whiff of her hair and gently whispered, "You smell yummy." into her ear. She grabbed your back as if she was hanging onto something. As if she was hanging on to something she never wanted to leave; something she never wanted to let go of. Shivers traveled down your spine at the thought that someone needed you as much as you needed them. This is only made you deepen the kisses. You could feel the goose bumps rise on her skin and her breaths deepening by every gentle touch you left on her body. This made you complete.

The fact that you had this much control over this girl's body made you smile into the warm kisses that you were leaving at her collarbone. You worked your way down, making sure that you didn't miss an inch of her soft skin. You were at her hip bones and her breathing was getting deeper, faster. Your lips kissed gently at her belly button. You looked up to see how the girl was reacting. You found her eyes were closed with her lips parted slightly.

That look; it drove you crazy. You wanted more. You wanted her to scream your name and plead for more. Maybe it was selfish that you wanted these things from her. Maybe it wasn't. At this point, you didn't care.

You hooked your fingers underneath her green underwear. She quickly shot up and asked if you were sure. You smiled and nodded at her because you were sure. So sure of everything. You were so sure of the raw and exposed girl lying down before you. You were so sure of all the kisses and goose bumps you left all over her body seconds ago. You were ready to show her all the feelings you could never put into words. You looked into those deep green eyes that you never failed to get lost in and told her to relax. She sat up and met your lips with hers. She cupped your face with her slender fingers and grazed her tongue against yours. She left you with a tender kiss on your forehead and laid back on the bed.

You slid the green panties off of her legs with care. The girl didn't budge because just like you, she was sure. She was ready to collapse beneath you. She was ready to finally give you that power; that control. So when you parted her thighs with your hands, she didn't object.

You touched her inner thighs with your lips, making sure that she could feel everything you she made you feel. You moved your lips closer and closer until there you were. You were face to face with everything that had been crowding your mind for so long. This was it. You whispered "Are you ready?" into her thighs. She whimpered and this made you want more. So you did just that. You got more.

You caressed her hip bones with your hands as you did your selfish work. Yes, this was everything. The girl that you loved finally gave into you. Her breathing got deeper and deeper the longer you swirled your tongue against her. Your finger followed your tongue and created bigger motions moving in and out of her. You heard it. That was it. What you were waiting for all night. She said your name at the back of her throat.

"Karma.."

This drove you insane and created that same pit in your stomach. You continued. Slowly and surely Amy was falling underneath the touch of your mouth. Her back started to arch and you could feel her tightening around you. Her lengthy moan was followed by a slow "Woah". You smiled into her because you were sure your work was done. You left one last kiss between her thighs and worked your way up.

There she was. Everything that you were so sure of melted under you. Her hair was all over the place. Her lips were swollen and her chest was still rising at a fast tempo. The look on her face was new to you. You had never seen it before. She looked satisfied, relaxed. She looked happy. You looked into her eyes and go lost once again. You whispered into her lips "I know" and continued to make them swell more.

You shot up out of your sheets quickly. Too quickly actually. You couldn't figure out if you were light headed from the sitting up or that dream. You touched your lips in hopes that they were just as swollen as they were in that dream.

Dream.

It was just that; a dream. You sunk back into your bed and a pit collapsed in your stomach, but not like the pit in the dream. This pit was empty. It was sucking everything you felt in that dream down with it. Every emotion, every pulse, every whimper; it was gone along with all the feeling you once had. You grabbed your phone by the nightstand in hopes that she texted you. Maybe she just over reacted. You unlocked the screen and there weren't any new messages. You didn't expect anything else. You laid it down and suffocated yourself with your blankets and your thoughts.

You laid their for a good while. You ignored your alarm. You didn't feel like going to school. Your mom came in to check on you. She insisted on drinking some tea and you did. It warmed your body up for a little bit, but then it grew cold again. You drifted back to sleep again. The next time you woke up your clock showed "4:25". Everyone was out of school and here you were; lying in bed empty and alone. But you've always laid in bed alone so why did it feel different? Because you were actually alone. Everyone you cared for shut you out. So you thought to yourself "Why get up?"

You laid there for a while and you jumped when your phone vibrated. You jumped up and checked it. It was a message; a message from Amy. It was time to get up.

_We need to talk.._

Were you excited? Or were you nervous? You didn't know and quite frankly you didn't care. You just wanted to talk to Amy and she wanted to talk to you. For right now, that was everything you needed.

_I'll be right over._

You hastily took of your clothes and jumped in the shower.

You felt it. You felt hope. Maybe she would forgive you as easily as you have forgiven her. You hope cause that's all you can do right now.

Hopefully it was enough.


	3. Chapter 3

**Not very happy with this. I felt like I needed to update I though. Anyway, please read and review! Any suggestions would be nice :).**

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><p>She was stood there at the door clueless like she had been for the past 5 minutes.<p>

She didn't really know what she was going to say. She screwed everything up. She forgave Amy already for her mistake and they were going to be normal again-Normal as they could be. They were going to be back to good again, but her desperation ruined the chances of being normal with her again.

She was so nervous to talk to her. I mean, what do you say to your best friend after you kiss her in front of her girlfriend? How do you say "I am so in love with you. You're everything I need. I'm sorry it just dawned on me lastnight after I kissed you infront of your perfect girlfriend." when she has finally moved on? How do you tell her that you dream about her and the thought about doing more than kissing makes your stomach turn(In the best of ways)? That's right, you don't because she is your best friend. She is your best friend that has finally moved on from you after being rejected from you. Telling her that you love her would only shatter her heart once again.

That's why Karma stood there like an idiot. She didn't how to deal with her feelings, much less talk about them. The thought of talking to the person that had a large influence on her scattered emotions scared her shittless. But she wanted to talk to Amy. She needed to talk to Amy even though she had no idea what to say, so she sucked it up.

_Just knock, Ashcroft. She's not going to kill you... Hopefully._

She drew her fist back and carefully knocked three times on the white door. After waiting for what felt like an eternity, Amy finally came at to the door.

Her tear-stained face was evidence that she was also suffering from this chaos. Her hair was up and her bangs were matted with tears . She was wearing a red and black flannel with a faded pair of jeans that hugged her hips just right. Karma couldn't stop studying her features. It was times like this that Karma realized how perfect her friend was. Even though she was obviously hurting, she still looked like Amy; beautiful and flawless. She was just happy to see her friend again, even in this state.

Amy was the first to speak.

"Hey."

"Hey. Umm, can I come in?" she carefully asked.

"Yeah." She could tell by the tone in her voice that she was not very excited to see Karma, but why would she be?

She noticed clothes were scattered on the floor as she walked in. There were obvious signs dripped all over the room that she was also hurting from all of this. There were tissues smeared with make up lying on the floor next to her bed. The donuts Reagan had for her sat on her dresser, untouched. Her bed was also unmade. The room reflected Amy's current state; messy and lost. Karma took a deep breath before taking a seat next to her on the bed. She grabbed her thighs because she had no where to put them, but mostly out of nervousness. Amy locked eyes with her. She looked like she was waiting for an apology? An explanation? Karma couldn't tell so she spoke out nervousness.

"So how was school today?" Karma said uneasily.

Amy squinted her eyes. She wasn't dumb. She knew Karma was avoiding the topic of importance but she played along.

"It was fine. You weren't there?"

"Yeah, just wasn't feeling it today."

Karma felt uneasy. They way she over exaggertated her words made it very clear. The tension in the air could be cut with a knife, but what was she supposed to say?

_The reason I kissed you lastnight was because I was lonely and sad and I needed you. Wanna hear something funny? After I kissed you, I found out that I __really really __needed you like more than friends. Also,I dreamt about you in a non-friend way and I really liked it. Ummm, yeah that's about it. Are we back to good now._

She could never say that. Especially like that. Karma had all the right to be on edge.

"Why is that? Do you feel better?" Amy continued playing along.

"I really didn't want to get up. You know, everyone has those days."

"Mhm." Amy nodded her head and eyed Karma suspiciously.

Karma knew that Amy wasn't dumb. It wouldn't be long before Amy got down to the meat and potatoes. So Karma mentally prepared for any shots that Amy would fire. It was simple, if Amy asked why she kissed her she would simply say, "I was really lonely and hurt. My body had a mind of it's own lastnight. You know how that goes right?". Okay, maybe she wouldn't exactly say that, but she would go along those lines.

"Okay, Karma. When I said I wanted to talk, I didn't want to talk about school." Amy's faced quickly switched from suspicious to hurt.

"Yeah, I know." Karma nodded her head and looked down. Amy rested her hand on her shoulder. It was a comforting gesture. Karma looked up at her green eyes.

"First off, I wanna apologize for yelling. I had no right. I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry for my stupid actions." Amy was being so understanding it scared her.

"It's okay. We all make mistakes. Trust me I know from experience." A slight grin broke on Amy's face. This was the first time Karma had seen her slightly happy in awhile, "But, I just need to know, Karma."

Karma knew playing dumb wasn't going to get anywhere. So she got down to the meat and potatoes.

"Why I kissed you, right?"

She couldn't tell her why she did it or what she meant by it. It would only make things worse in their relationship. Amy was just getting over Karma. There was no way Karma was going to jepordize Amy's happiness by telling her about these confusing emotions she had recently figured out herself. She was done putting her desires before other's.

"I honestly don't know." Her voice sounded scratchy. Acting was never her forte. She was always best with six strings and a voice.

"It's okay. I'll totally understand. We're best friends, remember? Just tell me why."

"Okay, then you'll understand that it meant nothing."

Amy looked annoyed, "I know when you're lying Karma. Best friends don't go around kissing their best friends."

"It meant nothing. I don't know what happened, okay?"

Amy's chest rose and she looked very aggrivated. She rose her voice a bit.

"I was the one you were kissing lastnight. And trust me Karma, it sure didn't feel like it meant "nothing"."

Karma was annoyed. She didn't want to tell Amy. She would never tell Amy. She just wouldn't drop it.

"Karma, I am your best friend! No matter what it is, I will understand!" Amy was yelling.

"Okay fine. You really wanna know why I kissed you?"

"Yes, I've been asking you this for like the past two hours." There was rich sarcasm in Amy's voice.

"I kissed you because I was hurt and alone. I don't know why I did it, but I did. Don't you have some history with that?"

Amy stood up. She couldn't sit down. Her body wouldn't allow it. "That was so different, and you know it." This wasn't a scream. You could hear the tears in her voice. She was hurt by her attack.

"How, Amy?" Karma still sat on the bed, arms crossed. She stood her ground. "Please do explain."

"How could you? Your actions had consequences. You know that, right? Reagan wants nothing to do with me now. I really liked her. Like I really really liked her. But it's done now." Amy's eyes filled with tears.

Karma immediatly stopped. She realized what she had done. She was being selfish again. Amy wanted to know, needed to know what that kiss meant and she did everything in her power to prevent her from finding out. And there she was, crying once again because of Karma. She sat up to comfort her friend.

"Don't cry, Amy please don't cry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

She wrapped Amy into her arms. She was crying too. Her friend was hurt once again because of her.

Amy looked up at Karma. She wiped her tears away with her thumb. Karma couldn't help but smile.

She looked beautiful. Even with tears running down her face.

"Just tell me, Karma. We're soul mates, remember?"

That's right. They were soul mates. They were going to grow old together. It's like Amy knew what Karma meant. What she felt. So Karma kissed her again to show her how she felt. She wrapped her arms around Amy's neck. Amy followed and put her hands on her waist. Karma felt whole again. She was questioning how she would break her feeling to Amy, but this was it. Everything she knew, everything she felt was moving with Amy's lips. Their lips parted and Karma rested her forehead against Amy's.

"I'm in love with you." she whispered against Amy's lips.

"I know."

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><p><strong>I do not know if I will end it here. I am actually very disappointed in this chapter. You have no idea how many times I tried writing this. This was the best version. I hope you enjoyed! I might end it. If I do, I will focus more on "A Beautiful Nightmare".<strong>


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